I am so glad you wrote this. I thought I was just weird!!!
This happened to me not long after my husband and I started dating. Except, I could only come from sex or stimulation from him. Jilling off was no help at all no matter what I did.
It took time but I finally got to the point where using a toy helped then manual stimulation worked in managed to fix it.
I don’t ever want to deal with that again. I love what my husband does for me but I like being able to do it for myself too